There’s something I believe parents get wrong…
The belief that they can “parent behavior _out_ of their kid”.
"If I just say the right thing... If I just do the right thing… then they’ll stop behaving so badly.”
I’m sorry to say, it doesn’t work that way.
You cannot parent behavior “out” of your strong-willed child.
It’s time to shift the focus from fixing your child to fixing the system.
And one way to do that is by centering the parent-child relationship.
When my client’s sons are struggling, I coach them to bring a level of compassion and understanding for his experience instead of coming down on him for his behavior.
So think: The next time your son is struggling, what will it take for you to respond to him by centering your relationship, rather than having a primal, controlling reaction?
It’s not easy, and you don’t have to be perfect. It’s a practice.
Our job as mothers to beautiful, sentient, strong-willed boys is to show empathy, understanding, and kindness because that is how you raise a boy who will do the same.